Lisa McDonald

Empowering Women And Men To Get Unstuck, Walk Their Own Path, And Have A Great Life

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07/05/2018 by Lisa McDonald

Letting Habits Go Can Be Uncomfortable

 Letting Habits Go Can Be Uncomfortable

Today’s post is continuing on the theme of habits.

In my last post I spoke about how habits can  hold your development back.   I shared a story about weaning my son from his habit of dummy sucking, including how it was holding his development back, his struggle and how we stepped him through it.  Click here to read my previous post.

Habits are uncomfortable to change, because they lack the familiarity that you’re used to.  However you cant always keep doing it the same old way.  Sometimes you need to find a new way … especially if you want to achieve goals.  .

Changing Circumstances May Require New Habits

Just as Charlie didn’t have a choice about his dummy being removed, you too will face times where your choices have been taken away.  You might not get to choose a change in circumstances, but you do have a choice as to how you handle that change in circumstances.  When these times appear you can fight or you can embrace the opportunity. You can be a victim or victor. Weak or empowered. At each step you have choices.  

Here are some of the basic changes my son went through when his circumstances changed, which meant he no longer had access to the old habit:

  • Happily sucking his dummy for comfort
  • Resisting a change he didn’t ask for it
  • The discomfort and struggle of withdrawing from the old way
  • Acting out his anger dissatisfaction, including oscillating between go away and come here
  • Adjusting to not having it readily available (yet would willingly take it back in a heartbeat)
  • A new normal; developing with residual attachment

How long before the attachment drops away altogether? … That remains to be seen – he still asks for it a few times most days.

Evolving Habits

Evolving Out of Old Habits

If you want to achieve your goals, then you need to evolve your ways of operating in alignment with your goals.

Just like Charlie, you have habits which help you to feel comfortable.  Each one has been adopted at some point in time because the strategy as worked for you – it helped you to operate in a certain way or achieve a certain outcome you wanted.  Then you repeated it and repeated it, utilising it routinely and automatically, without thinking.

At various points in your life you will find that your old habits are no longer serving you. For example they may be:

  • Outdated – there may be more modern options available
  • Having a detrimental effect which can’t be ignored (like my son’s dental bite problem). Or
  • Preventing your progress, growth and achievement of new results.

Once you recognise this, have the courage to confront and evolve.

Habits Required for Success

Achieving Goals

Achieving new goals (or old goals which haven’t yet been achieved) requires you to find new wsays of doing things.   You can’t expect to continue all your old habits, addictions and patterns and still expect to get new results. 

Instead you’ll need to do things differently.   You’ll need to learn new habits – ones which are aligned with your goals.    You’ll need to adjust your mindset, emotions and actions.   And it will take work to start the process, implement it and make it the new normal.

Changing Habits is Uncomfortable

Habits are comfortable – they have worked for you in the past so it gives you a level of certainty.  And, you’ve repeated them off enough that they are automatic.

Change is uncomfortable because it lacks the familiarity your’re used to – your new pattern of action is different and doesn’t just flow automatically.  Therefore it can feel unfamiliar, clunky and unnatural.  You have to retrain yourself repeatedly until the new way becomes your normal was of operating, automatically. 

Failing to get started in the first place, or stopping before it’s an ingrained habit will just reinforce the old habits – and you’ll continue to get the same old results.

Breaking Through Old Habits

You can break through your old habits, addictions and patterns – and you must if you want to progress and achieve your goals and dreams.

3 Important Questions

Here’s 3 important questions to ask your self if your serious about breaking through so you can achieving more success:

Thoughts + Feelings + Actions = Results

  1. What important goal/s are you’re working on?
  2. What habits, addictions or patterns are slowing you down or blocking your progress?
  3. How are you going to change these limiting habits, addictions or patterns?

 

Breaking Through Old Habits

You can break through your old habits, addictions and patterns by:

  • Clarifying the habits of thinking, feeling and actioning which require breakthrough
  • Connecting with your motivations for breaking through
  • Educating yourself on how to breakthrough
  • Implementing the activities required to breakthrough
  • Removing conscious and sub-conscious blocks to breaking through

Climbing the mountain: Up Down NeutralDoing it yourself is one option.  This option can be done by very rewarding.  However it can also be a very long and arduous journey with a big learning curve, as you navigate all the unknown territory.

Speeding Up The Breakthrough Process

If you are struggling to get the breakthrough you want, or want to speed up the breakthrough process, then work with someone who already has the knowledge, experience and resources to

assist you.  You’ll get the support you need to make progress towards your goals.  In the long run you can save a lot of time, effort and often money

If you have some important goals to achieve and would like some help to break through your habits, so you can achieve different results, please contact me.  I’d love to talk to you about what’s holding you back and how you can get your breakthrough.

Breaking through old habits, addictions and patterns is uncomfortable, however it’s an essential part of achieving your goals

What action step will you take today to improve your habits and advance your goals achievements?

Warm regards
Lisa

 

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27/02/2018 by Lisa McDonald Leave a Comment

6 Tips For Developing Your Own Success Genius

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Recently I came across a post on 6 Parenting Tricks That Children Into Geniuses, by David Wolfe. On reading the six tips, I starting thinking about how they were also great for adults to develop their own success genius.

After all adults are just big kids – there’s a child in all of us, and we need to nurture that child to develop our own success genius.  Doing so can help you to energise yourself for life and empower you to achieve your most important goals.

Developing Your Own Success Genius

Today’s blog lists Wolfe’s six tips, along with my ‘adult’ version for us big kids.  You can use them for developing your own success genius.  Read on for 6 Tips For Developing Your Own Success Genius: [Read more…]

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